Maybe he doesn't want to catch depression

In our small building there are a couple psychologist offices. There are just two bathrooms for the renters, one male and one female. So when one must relieve oneself, one must venture into the hall. The boss just returned from the can and announced that he doesn't like to "make eye contact with the crazies out there," referring to the people that are visiting their doctors.

Have some compassion dude.

What the Fuck?

The boss just came in and said that reason that that nutjob in Pennsylvania killed those Amish schoolgirls was because prostitution is not legal.

Earlier this year the boss said that prostitution is necessary for a country to succeed.

I think his mommy didn't love him enough or something.

Pneumonia Update

According to the Boss, his mum has fully recovered from her youmoanya. Yep, that's actually what he said, youmoanya. No question, he's retarded.

That's What Too Much Cleaning Will Do

So the Boss's mum is in the hospital. He thinks she has ammonia. I'm not sure if it's just a mispronunciation or he's retarded. Probably both.

But It's For The Kids!

"Everyone should be married and divorced at least once." -The Boss

"What an ass." -The Employee

Sporadic Table of Elements

"I find it hard to believe that hydrogen is lighter than helium." -The Boss

According to my pocket periodic table of elements, the boss's head is lighter than both helium and hydrogen.

Land of Lincoln

So, according to the boss, Chicago is in the great state of Ellanoise. I'm having the hardest time trying to find this state on my shower curtain atlas. Can anyone help me?

You Know You Want 'Em

"Then I throw in my nuts." -The Boss

I didn't catch the first part of this thought and I like it better that way.

It's So Frustating!

You know what is really frustrating? When someone, such as your boss, pronounces frustrating as fustrating. He sounds like a kid!

This is the first of hopefully many posts about my seemingly retarded boss. There will be a lot of posts about mispronunciation and comments on society that spew from his mouth. If you have any stories that you would like to share about your boss, please drop me a line and I will post it up here. I urge you to use false names in your stories to guarantee anonymity.