"I don't know what I did to deserve such a self centered kid."

-Boss, who claims to be able to read faster and comprehend more than anyone he knows, referring to his daughter that lives on the opposite side of the globe on not communicating often enough with him. 

Boss to mother: "You gave yourself cancer."

Wholesaler Guy: Good is good enough.
The Boss (in agreement): Yeah, good is the enemy of great.

"My brother's next door neighbor that lives across the street..." -The Boss

Maybe he doesn't want to catch depression

In our small building there are a couple psychologist offices. There are just two bathrooms for the renters, one male and one female. So when one must relieve oneself, one must venture into the hall. The boss just returned from the can and announced that he doesn't like to "make eye contact with the crazies out there," referring to the people that are visiting their doctors.

Have some compassion dude.

What the Fuck?

The boss just came in and said that reason that that nutjob in Pennsylvania killed those Amish schoolgirls was because prostitution is not legal.

Earlier this year the boss said that prostitution is necessary for a country to succeed.

I think his mommy didn't love him enough or something.

Pneumonia Update

According to the Boss, his mum has fully recovered from her youmoanya. Yep, that's actually what he said, youmoanya. No question, he's retarded.